How to teach a child to be happy
How to teach a child to be happy
5 Golden rules.
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Daily and hourly, by every word and act of the parents affect their children’s future, reports Rus.Media. We all want the best for them, and very trying to them it is “better” to provide, sometimes making the choice for them.
Toys and entertainment, education, and mugs, care, communication, walking. All of this top list of modern and responsible father. Is it enough that in the future our child could be happy? Answer a simple question: how do you define better? What brings you the greatest pleasure and makes life happy?
For most adults, happiness is inseparably connected with the happiness of their families, loved ones, children. Neither career, nor money, nor fame can’t replace the warmth of the family. To build a strong and happy family is a difficult science. In order to master it, you should start from childhood. Manners in the family, communication style, family values and traditions the children learn from their parents.
Parents – the most “affordable” adult in a child’s life to follow, in order to learn from them, learn from them. Everything the children learn parental behaviors in the family – both good and bad. And talking about this “parental inheritance” with them into adulthood. Inheritance comes in two variants – repetition (made me and I will do the same) or objections (I was forced, but I’m so not going to do).
Seven the first important years
To seven years the child is the programming in the subconscious region of the brain. At this age, the process is similar to photographing on film: all the memories of how they behaved mother and father in varying situations, frames imprinted in a child’s brain. In adulthood to remember, this information is often impossible, but in a similar situation this model is triggered, and the person begins to behave in the same way as were her parents. This is an automatic pattern of behavior and correct it can be very difficult.
Family model for working on the bugs
For example, the family model of “father home”. In this family the father is the leader, the breadwinner, the head. If he takes on responsibility for the family and its dominance is reasonable, it is likely that children will repeat the parent model: the son will become a responsible head of the family, and the daughter will choose a mate for life strong men. If the dominance of the father in the family “rolls over”, he is oppressive, rude and selfish, it is likely that implementing a variant of denial and the child will take with them a legacy installation “my family will be different.”
In the family model of “mother home”, on the contrary, the decision is made by the mother provides the family bears the primary responsibility. The father in such a family often plays the role of slave, and the mother does not hide his neglect and podavlyayushego attitude. Gender roles are reversed, and the probability that the daughter will choose a strong and responsible partner in life, a small. As well as the fact that the son in this family will grow up to become independent and self-sufficient man, able to take responsibility.
If in such a family, the mother understands dangerous for the future of children the consequences of their “public” dominance, it will not diminish the role of the father in the family that will help shape the right attitudes in children.
Family model “parents workaholics” is very common in the modern world. It is dangerous because there is a shift of values and priorities: children learn a rule, what is important in life – work, secondary is family. This model involves the distancing of parents from children, daddy-workaholics often see their children grow in the photos. Mom needs great wisdom to form in children that dad makes for the family. To change the situation in a root can only experience the father with the child. The child simultaneously develops two models of behavior – maternal and paternal. These models are different, but the main things they need to match.
5 rules for the inheritance of happiness:
Whatever the model of the family was in your house taking a few simple but very important rules fundamentally able to transform your parent inherited a treasure for a child.
The first rule: never find out the relationship with the child. Differences of any sort between mom and dad should remain “behind closed doors”. This is the key fundamental Foundation of the family as a single monolithic and unbreakable partnership. In addition, you will receive a great bonus of the parent: the child is able to manipulate relations between parents when one prohibits and the second permits – because in his mind the opinions of the parents coincide.
Rule two: show the children a good relationship, affection and love for your husband (wife). Did you know that the majority of children of secondary school age the biggest fear is that parents can get divorced? In your power to eliminate stress from children’s lives and to form in them a positive attitude saying pleasant emotions and feelings to loved ones. It stains with love, kindness, care, affection, warmth, to lay in the subconscious of the child model of his future family.
The third rule: never break your negative emotions on relatives. As if you weren’t annoyed or upset, not valueprice it in the family. Instead, pay attention to your needs and unwind – go to the cinema, for a walk, in the bath or “SByte” punching bag. You don’t want to have your child in my wonderful future family screaming at your other half and children or he chose his companions disturbed person?
Rule four: be sure to encourage communication with your children and grandparents. If there is no possibility of communication with relatives and grandparents, be sure to find your affordable surrounded by wise older person, which will connect the chain of generations.
Rule five: continue the family tradition and create your own. It a family tradition to paint the original portrait of a family and bring home happiness. Remember those good traditions, which were in the families of your ancestors. Tell us about them children. Take your family those that you the road. Come up with new and they keep. For example, be sure to bake a cherry pie for Christmas and the family gathering this afternoon for tea. No matter what, where ever you are, always in the day to gather at one table. Or annually to replenish the family album with new photos and be sure to see it all together.
What can we do?
To share your experience, your knowledge and skills. To teach the same that we know and can do. Each of us has his own picture of the world in which we orientirueshsya. Their peaks and goals, your worries and fears, their concepts of good and evil. If it suits us, we pass it on to your child, consciously and unconsciously, all the time, every minute of his life.
If our picture of the world is imperfect, we can complement and enhance in children, so that they do not repeat our mistakes and do not fall into a difficult situation that has befallen us.
You share with your children that you have, now, this very minute. Make sure that your parental inheritance brought only good. Start now. From this moment on. Use your opportunity to make your future child happy.