Why do people scream? What if you scream?
Why do people scream? What if you scream?
“Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than anything on which it is poured.” (C) mark TWAIN.
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Creek – a subject which concerns every individual on this planet, because every raised voice for once in your life. Some people cry regularly, but we all at some point guilty in a scream. There are ways a reaction to the screamer that will help to defuse the situation and not continue to strengthen it, reports Rus.Media.
Creek in the relationship – not healthy and the results do not bring anything good. A person can give in to the screamer at the time of the scream, to stop him, but as soon as things go back to normal, they usually come back to his mind, for the cry is not permanently changed their worldview. For example, a mom who yells at the kids, so they Packed up their toys, as a result of the fact that children at that time collect the toys. But it doesn’t change their Outlook on what they need to pick up your toys constantly. The children will learn how to collect toys, if you teach them the system of carrots and sticks, then they will understand the importance of collecting toys.
Creek spoils relations. This is not a constructive method of solving a difficult situation, but everyone resorts to shouting. Some more than others. You should be aware of your own Creek, to understand why some people constantly shouting, and also know how to handle a screamer.
When someone’s life is constantly shouting at you, they Express emotional tyranny towards you. Their goal is to take advantage of the situation and the cry is their way of gaining control over you. It is a form of intimidation. The Creek might work for a while. But prolonged use results from the Creek is not good, because this way makes a man do what he wants. A cry for a relationship not useful, it actually destroys healthy communication and intimacy in a relationship.
Why do people scream?
When someone is angry and shouts, there are many reasons for their scream. Most of the reasons why they cry, is not worth a cry, therefore it is important that the person shouting, reacted correctly, i.e. should not react, shouting shouting. It is important to understand why someone is screaming, because most of the Creek is an indicator of problems in the human psyche that is absolutely not relevant to someone screaming. Their cry is a reflection of emotional instability, despite the fact that he needs to show strength and dominance in a situation. Below are some of the reasons through which people shout when angry:
1. The inability to cope with difficulties
Many people cry because it is their habitual mechanisms of behaviour in difficult situations. But this mechanism is no good and lasting results. If a man cries, because he learned to cope with difficulties in life, he needs to help find better ways to manage their emotions. He can use emotional outbursts to cope with difficulties, and it’s not good neither for him nor for those who splash out emotions.
2. Loss of control
A person can be a crier, because he feels that is losing control over the situation. They can be filled with thoughts, feelings, emotions and they feel a loss of control over everything. For them it is a lot of confusion, so they scream to get control over what they feel. They have skills is not enough to cope with difficulties and to obtain a sense of control over the situation and the environment, so they resort to shouting, to feel in control. They can obtain this feeling of control, but most often it is temporary, because most of the problems can not be solved by shouting. It may seem that people agreed with the screamer, just enough to calm him down, but in fact, the problem remains unresolved.
3. The sense of threat
Often the offenders are people with a very sensitive emotional core and they are trying to protect the rod. Every time they think that the web is under threat, they act. Creek is one of the tools that they use every time they feel threatened.
4. Aggressive tendencies
Some people are just aggressive personality. They can scream and aggression can escalate into physical violence. It’s rare to see a fight that does not start with a high voice, shout or ora. If someone you don’t know very well yells at you, you have to be careful because the sound can lead to physical confrontation.
It is important to avoid aggressive reactions to aggressive screamers because that’s like pouring oil on the fire of their anger and it could escalate into a fight. Most likely it will, if they have such tendencies and you shout the answer.
5. Memorized behavior
Some people become whistleblowers because they grew up in an atmosphere where they gave birth regularly shouted. They learned that when conflict rises, rises and the voice. They have not learned correct behavior when faced with conflict or difficult situations. The Creek has always been their habitual responses to situations in which they experience anxiety.
6. The feeling of uselessness
Some people raise their voice and shout because they think that the other person does not listen to them. They may even be repeated several times, and in the end, they resort to shouting, because the other person does not respond to another tone. It often happens in the case of the screaming parents for children. Parents think that their children do not listen, so instead of constantly repeating the same thing, they yell at their children. The problem is that it actually scares kids. The Creek is also very harmful to children and research shows that it harms as well as physical violence.
Any reactions should be avoided with a screamer
The worst possible reactions to a scream – to shout in response. Nothing will go wrong, if you yell at someone who yells at you. There are other reactions that may worsen the situation, and which should be avoided. Among them: to incite the Barker, to question what they say, to defend and criticize the person during the collision.
There are better ways to deal with the screamer. Here are the steps you should use in order to cope and, hopefully, to reassure the screamer.
- Stay calm and do not increase their anger. Remember that when a person yells, then the problem is not you and him. They do not know how to cope with difficulties, or they have another reason to cry that has nothing to do with you. If you react, they will react to your reaction and the situation will continue to deteriorate. Keep calm, even if inside you boil. It’s not worth it to feed them cry, because the situation will only get worse and problems are seldom resolved when the two sides shouting at each other. Problems are more likely to be resolved in a calm tone. Be part of the solution, not the problem that remains calm and using a calm tone.
- Mentally take a step back to assess the situation. Before you take any action in a situation, mentally resupinatus to assess what is happening. This will allow you to understand whether or not to wait for the screamer to calm down, or just leave. If you yells a regular friend and you care about will be offended if you leave, then just go. You don’t have to endure the neglect, if these people are not important in your life. If you shouted the chief, and you know that if you go when he says, it can cost you your job, then you may want to wait and talk about the Creek with the head later if it happens all the time and now it prevents your effective work.
- Don’t settle with the screamer to calm them because it provokes a cry in the future. If you agree with the screamer and accordingly, agree to do or say something that they ask you approve of their cry. To agree with someone who yells at you, only encourages them to scream at you to get what you want in the future. Avoid this type of sedation, because it will come back to you in the future and you will be screaming more often.
- Calmly react to the scream. In most cases, when someone yells at you, awaken your emotions and you feel the need to respond. To react, shouting, criticism or other negative manifestations, will aggravate the situation, you need to do everything in your power to control your thoughts and emotions to enable you to cope with this problem, that is their cry. Let the person understand that you will not tolerate the cry, despite the situation or problem. Say it politely and calmly, and you are likely to receive in response a positive response, for example, an apology, or at least they realize that they are shouting. Some people don’t even understand what they scream. Then your next step will be to ask this person about the break.
- Ask them about the break. After you reacted calmly to the screaming, the next step is to ask this person to leave you so you could think of. You may also need time to calm down, because their cry was raised, your adrenaline levels to dizzying heights, and you don’t know how much longer I can keep him inside. When you ask the person about the break, it should be more in the form of a statement than question, especially if it’s your boss. If it’s your partner, friend, or someone else, it is quite acceptable to say that you need a break and some time (a few minutes a day, or as YOU need) to think and react accordingly and safely.
- When you feel that your emotions have settled and you know how to deal with what is screaming, you can come back to talk to that person. Give yourself time to understand the situation, what was said, and how you want to respond. For some situations, for example, in the relationship, it may take a few days, because emotions need more time to calm down. If it’s the boss, and you know that you can’t pull too long, because there are deadlines and at stake is your job, then use the technique of sedation, for example, deep breathing or visualization techniques to quickly think about the situation that it could return as early as possible.
To move on in the best conditions
Due to the fact that you took the time to give people to understand that the screaming is unacceptable and asked the man about the break just after the Creek, it is less likely that this person will now be on you scream. If they want to continue the conversation, they need to stay calm, to discuss the theme. You are not only protecting yourself and show this man that will not let him go, but you also help them understand that their behavior is unacceptable. If more people did it when they shout, we all would have more opportunities to avoid the Creek.
If the Creek became a habit and your new actions have not changed their behavior, then maybe it is time to ask them to sit down and discuss their cry. When you speak, let the person know how the Creek affects you. For example, you are very sad after they cry and you don’t want to be with this person for a while. Also let them know how it affects your relationship. For example, this creates an emotional gap between you. If they say “I am what I am”, let them know that this is unacceptable.
Some people also don’t know how to change their behavior. Professional help (e.g. therapy, counselling, or courses on anger management) is available for people who have problems with the Creek. They need to realize that the problem has affected their relationships and the changes you need to this relationship to cure.
A cry breaks, so don’t let them continue to destroy you or your relationship, enduring cry.